All the things you could ever wish to know about me.
What is more difficult for you; looking into someone’s eyes when you are telling someone how you feel, or looking into someone’s eyes when they are telling you how they feel?
Neither is difficult really. I'm all about emotional support and evolution.
Think of the last time you were REALLY angry.
Today when my mom unnecessarily freaked out at me because I was CLEANING MY ROOM.
You are on a flight from Honolulu to Chicago non-stop. There is a fire in the back of the plane. You get enough time to make ONE phone call. Who would you call?
Tough one. It depends, am I alone on this flight? Probably Jorge or my mom.
You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?
a)Not EVERYONE, just the people it would affect.
b)LIVE OUTRAGEOUSLY. Do absolutly anything and everything without thinking about it.
c)Well honestly, kinda. At this point in my life, I'm pretty scared about the afterlife thing, if it involves religion. I don't particularly want to be burning in a hell I never believed in.
You can have one of the following two things: trust/love.
Love. Trust can be earned, and achieved. Love is just love.
You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?
Save the dog! Screw my boss. I'm not going to let an animal suffer and die right in front of me just because I might lose my job. I would take it as a sign from the universe that it just wasn't the job for me ;)
If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Everywhere, not just one place. EVERYWHERE, and see EVERYTHING.
Think of the last person who you really knew that died. You have the chance to give them 1 hour of life back, but you have to give one year of your life. Do you?
I've never lost anyone that I was really really close to me.
Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?
Definatly not. I'm not social, so I cant be brought around your new friends without some sort of embarassing awkwardness. I'm there in a crisis, but other than that I need lots and lots and lots of space, and theres nothing I hate more than unwanted social obligations. Which, may be why I have very few close friends.
Your best friend dies, what would you do?
I would be left with absolutly no will to live. I'd die too.
When and how was the last time you told someone HONESTLY how you felt? when was it? during the day? how was it?
Today, I told my mom I felt like shit because I ran out of my depression medicine yesterday and didn't take it. Um, it was fine? It's always kind of relieving and satisfying to share your shitty feelings with another. *makes a face*
What would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or that you do not love them back?
That I do not love them back. I don't understand why people find it hard to say "I love you." I really don't get it, SPREAD THE LOVE.
What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up on?
The future I have in my mind.
Thats why I'm not going to give up.
Excluding romantic love, when was the last time you told someone you loved them?
Huh, good question.
If you had to go back in time and change one thing, if you HAD to, even if you had “no regrets” what would it be?
I really don't know, I don't want to change anything, everything got me to where I am now...which isn't great but it's better than where I have been. I can't answer this.
Imagine. It is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you hear someone walking around outside your window. Who do you call?
Ghostbusters! I'd probably freak out and call the police.
Would you give a homeless person CPR if they were dying?
Of course! What a stupid question, what person with a heart would let a person of any sort die right in front of their face.
Are you old fashioned?
Not in my beliefs. I HATE the words "appropriate/inappropriate" and "acceptable/unacceptable." They usually refer to old-fasioned social expectations and silly ideas of how to live. I HATE THOSE WORDS SO MUCH.
It's like right and wrong, who the hell gets to decide these stupid judgements.
Which would you choose, true love with a guarantee of a heart break or have never loved before?
To have never loved before.
If you could do anything OR wish for anything that would come true, what would you wish?
Oh boy :) I would move out RIGHT NOW. And start my own life, and never have to hear about right, wrong, acceptable, appropriate...ever again. I would live my life the way I want to, and I would have my future the way I want it without any complications.
What is the most annoying habit that your girlfriend/boyfriend has?
Taking himself too seriously and not realizing how great he is, and taking the world too seriously and not realizing what a shit hole it is.
Have you ever not made it to the bathroom in time and had an "accident?"
I don't know, probably in the midst of my pottytraining?
What is the most embarrassing thing you've ever done?
Eh, just awkward little things here and there. I like to think I'm immune to embarassment
Have you ever cheated on your boyfriend/girlfriend?
Never ever.
What is the strangest dream you've ever had?
All of my lesbian dreams are pretty out there.
If you could make anyone in the room your servant for the day, who would it be and what would you make them do?
Nobodys in the room with me...
If you could be born again would choose to be a different sex to what you are?
No, I like being a girl.
What is the stupidest thing you've done because someone dared you to?
I don't know. I haven't played truth or dare since I was like 10. And I'm usually the one doing the daring.
What's the worst thing about being your gender?
Periods, childbirth, powerful emotions, hormones, standards, blah blah blah.
Do you think you're a good judge of character?
I think I'm an EXCELENT judge of character.
What talent do you wish you'd been born with?
I don't know, just some designated talent. I'm sort of all over the place.
How did you rebel as a child?
Screaming and being sassy and doing as I pleased.
What did you hide from your parents?
My own hair that I cut, and anything else I wanted hidden.
Are you the same person you were as a child, or much different?
Pretty much the same. Just a little wierder.
Talk about a time when you got into trouble at school.
8th grade, fish-face Solis. I made his class ultimately difficult and I think I was held after class every single day. I would often lead people in screwing with his head too. At one point he would keep putting me in this damn desk in front of the class and make me stare at the wall. I always got kicked out in the hallway then had a sterm "squating fish-face" talking-to.
Do you consider your childhood a happy one?
Definatly not.
What is your saddest memory?
I have many many many.
Do you believe in soul mates?
I like to.
Do you believe you found your soul mate?
I do :) I really do.
Which was the last restaurant you went to?
On the Border
Is there a secret you've never told anyone?
Nope :) Jorge knows ALL.
Do you like yourself?
Without interferences.
Have you ever dyed your hair?
Purple
Are you an emotional person?
I don't know anymore. Yes, I suppose.
What's something that can always make you feel better?
Jorge and I being together.
Did your parents spoil you as a child?
No.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Monday, August 3, 2009
And do adults just learn to play the most rediculous, repulsive games; My hatred for Normalism.
I spend most of my time feeling frusterated and anxious and never knowing why. I think of myself as quite a pacifist so I've been thinking that maybe I bottle up all of my anger causing myself to rot from the inside out. I have no problem reacting to anyone in my family if they piss me off, but otherwise I usually ignore anything and everything that bothers me to avoid more social awkwardness than I already have. I also think that the world is, in nice words, a big shit hole, so I find it useless to let any little thing weigh too much on my mind, causing me to feel neutral about small details, making me a very emotionally numb person. As many opinions as I seem to have about anything, I make most of them up just to be able to HAVE an opinion. In reality, I really couldn't care any less about 95% of the world.
Anybody who knows me knows that I'm weird. When I grow up, I WILL have a clothesline and a pet pig/llama/cow etc. and everything I have "control" (notice it's in quotes; no matter how much you would like to/think you do, you will NEVER control another living thing completely, especially a person.) of will have total freedom. Living things need freedom. Real freedom; a personal freedom that comes with personal consequences and is not, under any circumstances, interfered with. I decided I hated people a long time ago, but I really can't stand "normalists." Normalists are moral rule followers, and I believe there are more of these types of people than any other in the world. Normalism is like a culture or a lifestyle....or a cult. Normalists have normal, steady jobs, and normal families; ones where childen are inferior and expected to grow in the direction of their parent's normalist wishes, and get good grades (for their normalist job, of course, which will be needed for their normalist purchases and normalist lifestyle) and have normalist friends and have a perfectly planned normalist future. I HATE NORMALISM. I want to actually live life, one big adventure, full of traveling and REAL learning and experiences, and strange or different ways of living, full of struggles and feelings. Normalists harshly judge anything that is different than their lame normalist ways. Life should be LIVED. I've decided that it's not bottled up anger or depression thats making me feel trapped in a life I don't want to live. It's because I'm litterally trapped in the boring, oppressing, understimulating, normalist life, and I'm too young and restricted to do anything about it. I want and need to live somewhat on the edge. (not ON the edge like some brainless daredevil which I certainly am not, but somewhere where I could have a nice view of it.) I don't want to be a normalist trapped in pathetic guidelines and "right & wrong" rules and life boundaries that you don't set for yourself. Normalism is a disease, and I've decided it's my main reason for hating the world-It's polluted with normalism bullshit.
Anybody who knows me knows that I'm weird. When I grow up, I WILL have a clothesline and a pet pig/llama/cow etc. and everything I have "control" (notice it's in quotes; no matter how much you would like to/think you do, you will NEVER control another living thing completely, especially a person.) of will have total freedom. Living things need freedom. Real freedom; a personal freedom that comes with personal consequences and is not, under any circumstances, interfered with. I decided I hated people a long time ago, but I really can't stand "normalists." Normalists are moral rule followers, and I believe there are more of these types of people than any other in the world. Normalism is like a culture or a lifestyle....or a cult. Normalists have normal, steady jobs, and normal families; ones where childen are inferior and expected to grow in the direction of their parent's normalist wishes, and get good grades (for their normalist job, of course, which will be needed for their normalist purchases and normalist lifestyle) and have normalist friends and have a perfectly planned normalist future. I HATE NORMALISM. I want to actually live life, one big adventure, full of traveling and REAL learning and experiences, and strange or different ways of living, full of struggles and feelings. Normalists harshly judge anything that is different than their lame normalist ways. Life should be LIVED. I've decided that it's not bottled up anger or depression thats making me feel trapped in a life I don't want to live. It's because I'm litterally trapped in the boring, oppressing, understimulating, normalist life, and I'm too young and restricted to do anything about it. I want and need to live somewhat on the edge. (not ON the edge like some brainless daredevil which I certainly am not, but somewhere where I could have a nice view of it.) I don't want to be a normalist trapped in pathetic guidelines and "right & wrong" rules and life boundaries that you don't set for yourself. Normalism is a disease, and I've decided it's my main reason for hating the world-It's polluted with normalism bullshit.
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